12... and counting...

Song of the day:
Daughtry featuring Slash!
"What I Want"

July 2007 marks the beginning of another academic year for me.

The number 12 would be an important one.

12 more months.

I'm gonna end my stay in the varsity that I don't love but don't hate.

Final year approaches, which is kinda eerie in some ways.

I've lost damn lot of interest in studies during the 2 month++ industrial training.

And I've lost my focus on studies.

Yet tonnes of tasks would force me to regroup my attention.

When would that happen?

Anyway, final year project would begin approximately on Monday, after I get to know who my facilitator would be.

It's scary to even think about that.

Let's reminisce a little about my past 3 years in my varsity, UTM.

It's not much of a memorable experience.

But I've known some cool friends, some pretty interesting people along the way.

I've also witnessed some reality of life in between.

Politics is always dirty I tell ya. Something in varsity that I witnessed taught me about it.

For example, UTM authority practise what I call "Autocratic System".

In varsities, there would be polling day annually in order to choose the new set of students representatives in the Senate.

But starting from don't know when, due to complains from the varsity authority about the ways the candidates attract votes, they dismissed almost all the student representatives that got the most votes and replaced them with their own.

What a joke. Dirty system.

Racial issues cannot be totally erased. Bias is still a pretty heavy element in Malaysia local varsities.

One obvious example is the STPM (Form 6) vs Matriculation.

Dude, matriculation would always have to stand aside if compared to STPM.

Matriculation is only a way to help the Malays to achieve varsity entries. What about other races?

And please, the percentage of Malays entering local uni is definitely large because of the way the Government handles such stuff (special mandate).

BIAS...

Malaysian mentality - Government sectors, including local varsities would always adopt what they call the best solution to everything, which is "Prevention is better than cure".

For example, my varsity set a set of stupid rules (namely No leaving the campus after 12 midnight) to prevent students from any accidents.

C'mon dude, that's not gonna prevent anything much.

And a general reminder to these Government sectors - Educating people would be a much better, effective way.

Sigh.

All these rants are pointless to be honest.

Fast forward to now, the final year would be a damn busy experience.

I don't know how I would handle the pressure but I'll try to stay as close to my family and friends around me as possible.

12 more months and I'm leaving the varsity to head for the step up in life.

I have to admit that I'm still a kid-adult or kidult so I won't be able to convert into a 100% adult.

I'm pretty sure of that.

Till now, I still don't have a clear view of my future.

But I've set some new goals.

I wanna finish my scuba diving lessons and achieve a license.

Then I'll decide what I would do with the license.

Post-graduation period would be a vital one for me to decide my direction of life.

However, it's still pretty vague.

One voice tells me that I should ditch engineering and do what I want in life.

Another voice tells me to stick with engineering.

I know what I want even before I step into UTM.

So, the final decision is a dilemma.

That's only my rough draft.....

I Tried...

Song of the day:
Bone Thugs-N-Harmony
featuring Akon
"I Tried"

I've an announcement to make...

Me.

Kelvin.

Has flunked....

AGGAAINN!

Hurray dude! Let's party dude!

Sounds crazy isn't it?

How many times must it happen to me? 100 times? 1000 times?

I don't even know how long I can live to get 100 times of chances.

In case you don't know what I'm talking about, I'll quote the previous blog entry so you can understand what I've said.

"I'm still single but it very much depends on the agenda that I've mentioned earlier in this blog entry."
- Pre-season... / Constipation Vs Pooing...

The whole situation is like that:

I know a girl, A since secondary school time (at that time I was a sixth former and she's only 4th former).

She was really cute and cheerful as that's her real character. Of course that's gotta attract my attention.

But I didn't exactly know her until after she graduated from secondary school. Then I realise that I get along with her well so I started to feel good about being with her.

Next, she started working full time and working part time. So her life got busy and I didn't get to see her many times within the next 2 years.

Fast forwarding to now, only the past Saturday I met her for the 5th time in 2 years ++.

I gave her birthday presents, including a birthday card and a confession note. But I didn't directly confess to her.

So for the next 2 days, I tried to sms her back but she didn't reply.

Only this afternoon that I received her reply which said "Oh I don't know how to reply you. I want my bf in the future to be in the same field with me...".

Haha.

Sounds crap isn't it?

That's life dude.

I tried to know her and be patient. But my feelings only grew a few months ago.

Anyway, romance is the hardest subject in the world.

One can work hard for it but never get back the same result. NEVER I say.

It's true. It's tough and it's unpredictable. It's so bias that sometimes I wonder what romance is all about.

It seems to me that I can't choose but other people especially girls can choose.

So I'm frustrated. And I wonder why should I even pursue romance now in my life?

A waste of time isn't it? Ya, I thought so.

My life is not as great as everybody thinks and I'm a loner in some ways.

Therefore a soulmate or a girlfriend is a good option to share views, share my care and kindness to a person.

Sigh. I tried.

Maybe it's me against the world again. Whatever. Let them choose.

I'll get my chance to reject girls which I doubt would happen in my life time.

Haha...

Tsk tsk...

Girls is a hard topic to tackle and good luck to those who are tackling them right now.

* * * * * * * * * *

Intro

Bone Thugs Akon yeah
You know though nothin' come easy, you gotta try real, real hard
I tried hard, but I guess I gotta try harder.

Chorus

I tried so hard, can't seem to get away from misery,
Man I tried so hard, but always be a victim of these streets,
It Ain't my fault cause I, try to get away but trouble follows me,
And still I try so hard, hopin one day they'll come and rescue me,

But until then, I'll be posted up right here rain, sleet, hail, snow (hail snow)
But until then, I'll be posted up right here with my heat gettin dough (gettin' dough)

Verse 1

First, let me explain that I'm just a black man,
And I come from the darkside, so I'm havin a hard time stayin on track man,
My mind be racin', and I don't even know what I'm chasin yet
Been in and out of relationships, I'm startin to see that it's me where the complications at
But I'm layin back, prayin' that, you get that piece of mind of me
I thought I was right, but really I'm wrong, but again I was too blind to see,
I was in the fast lane chasin my dream,
And then it seemed when the fame and cash came, they just got me,
Goin crazyyyy, (lately, lately) lately I been so faded trying to erase it,
But I just can't cause the drama just grows greater,
And I been in so many collisions by puttin shit off till later.
Chorus

I tried so hard, can't seem to get away from misery,
Man I tried so hard, but always be a victim of these streets,
It Ain't my fault cause I, try to get away but trouble follows me,
And still I try so hard, hopin one day they'll come and rescue me,

But until then, I'll be posted up right here rain, sleet, hail, snow (hail snow)
But until then, I'll be posted up right here with my heat gettin dough (gettin' dough)

Verse 2

It's like I'm takin five steps forward, and ten steps back
Tryna get ahead of the game but I can't seem to get it on track
And I keep runnin away the ones that say they love me the most
How could I create the distance when it's supposed to be close? And uh,
I just don't know but I be out here fightin demons and
It's like the curse that I can't shake this part of Cleveland and
Lord, would you help me? And stop this pain
I keep inflinctin on my family (family)
Hustlin and gamblin, drinkin' and scramblin'
And losin sight of what I supposed to be handlin'
It's hard to manage cause every days a challenge and man
And I'm slippin can't lose my balance and tryin not to panic

Chorus

I tried so hard, can't seem to get away from misery,
Man I tried so hard, but always be a victim of these streets,
It Ain't my fault cause I, try to get away but trouble follows me,
And still I try so hard, hopin one day they'll come and rescue me,

But until then, I'll be posted up right here rain, sleet, hail, snow (hail snow)
But until then, I'll be posted up right here with my heat gettin dough (gettin' dough)

Verse 3

I see thangs won't change (wont change) I'm stuck in the game
As soon as I get out it keeps pullin me back man (pullin me back man)
Got me doin' dirty dirt, so used to this hustlin money,
That I don't understand no nine to five work
Studied on the streets, hustlas know what I mean
Thugstas ballin' before us I'm tryna make that major league
So we never leave never till the sun came up (came up)
Gotta get it nope, no leavin, no grudge (no grudge) today games they play gotta go hard to get what you put in, if you fall off then its all on you (on you) gotta watch what you sign too, try so hard but I won't act a fool.

Chorus

I tried so hard, can't seem to get away from misery,
Man I tried so hard, but always be a victim of these streets,
It Ain't my fault cause I, try to get away but trouble follows me,
And still I try so hard, hopin one day they'll come and rescue me,

But until then, I'll be posted up right here rain, sleet, hail, snow (hail snow)
But until then, I'll be posted up right here with my heat gettin dough (gettin' dough)

Pre-season... /Constipation Vs Poo-ing...

Song of the day:
Saosin
"You're Not Alone"

Finally!

I've finished doing my industrial training and the corresponding report.

What a boring duration of my life! Damn the boss.

But it's a relaxing place to work and my boss was "OK" to me though.

One thing I don't like about him: He's biased.

My colleague, who's my coursemate also, is from the same hometown as my boss and they speak almost the same language.

Anyway, I wouldn't care about anything regarding the industrial training already.

Lol.

So, it's pre-season here in my life. Pre-season before the real season begins. :(

Luckily for me (unlike DLG, Li Ann in disguise), I've one week of off time before burying myself into a sea of assignments and university chores.

I've been spending endless of time waiting for Arsenal transfers.

And I've been chatting with Wei Jie (Starghazzer) and Sanderson (a friend from Scunthorpe, England) almost everyday about Arsenal.

Boring life? Yeah, maybe but Arsenal is my life.

This week, I've a special agenda in my books. It's pretty tricky to handle though.

If the outcome is positive, I'll post it onto my blog. I promise!

It's the hardest subject in the world. So you make the guess. Hehe.

Pre-season. Arsenal are gonna be having pre-season matches very soon.

Arsenal would play against Barnet this Saturday but I don't think I'll have the chance to watch it UNLESS I've a live stream for that match. Hehe.

I'll make a summary about Arsenal's signings during mid July because I basically think that Arsene's spending spree wouldn't stop at the 4th signing, which was only announced earlier today.

La-Sagna at Emirates

La-Sagna. Delicious. :p

This blog entry is a bit lame, I know but I couldn't find any better topic to talk about.

I'm still the same old me, playing FM 2005 and I'm in the year 2039.

And I'm still listening Daughtry's album and yet to really feel attracted to any new albums.

I'm still single but it very much depends on the agenda that I've mentioned earlier in this blog entry. Lol.

* * * * * * * * * *

However, my constipation situation got better since I started shifting my mattress and sleep on the floor.

My bed has bended inwards due to my weight and thus causing me to sleep in the wrong posture for quite sometime already.

4 weeks ago, the constipation situation surfaced and I was brought to a Chinese medical hall and had medicine.

2 weeks later, I thought my situation got better but only after a few days, the situation resurfaced.

I went back to visit the same Chinese physician and got 3 additional medicine added to the original 2 types of medicines.

So I had a week of "medicine consuming" process and eventually got better. And that was only last week.

I don't know how I got the idea of the cause of my illness due to bad sleeping posture but I was determined to change my sleeping posture and thus moving my mattress.

Thank God, I got my smooth disgestion back. And I realise that poo-ing smoothly is indeed a blessing. :)

Sorry for the disgust. Hehe.

I'll be back very soon!